Bad Advice: Filter and Trust Your Gut

What to do when you get bad career advice (and how to avoid it in the first place)

April 22, 2025

There are a lot of sources of advice out there. You can seek input from your friends, family, mentors, bosses and even online resources. You’ve probably been in a situation where you searched “need job advice” or “career mentor” online or even turned to a trusted colleague who knows more about the players and situation you’re facing. But even well-meaning mentors, managers, and colleagues can give bad advice – something about it is just not quite right for you. Maybe the input doesn’t align with your goals, values, or your best interests.

These advisors are not intentionally trying to steer you wrong. They are offering a perspective based on their own experiences, biases and understanding. It’s up to you to put your own lens on the situation and advice. You’ve got to learn how to spot and navigate bad career advice and ultimately make your own decision.

Here are some ideas on how to recognize when advice might not be right for you and what to do about it.

When I Got Bad Advice

I’ve been lucky to have some great mentors throughout my career, but I’ve also received my fair share of questionable advice. Here are two examples that stand out:

The “Stay Safe” Suggestion

Early in my career, I had been in my current role for three years and had mastered it. I had grown from “the new guy” to a more tenured role with additional responsibilities. I received high performance ratings and I thought I was ready to move up within the company to a higher-level job. There was a role I had my eye on – it was the kind of promotion that I knew would push me, but it would also come with a pretty big learning curve. It was a little bit uncomfortable to think about leaving a job I was doing really well in, but it was also exciting to think about taking on a new challenge.

In the process of learning about the new role and preparing to throw my hat in, I spoke with a more senior person I looked up to. I described the new job, my skillset, my aspirations. I was somewhat surprised when they came back with some words of caution. They suggested that I stay put in my current job for a while longer. They reasoned that the experience and stability I had in my current function would serve me well in the long run. Moving to a new job came with risks and unknowns, and they thought the timing was not right for that.

Their advice definitely made me pause. I thought about what they told me, and considered what other options might open up for me in the next 6 months. I ended up dropping my pursuit of the promotion for the time being and staying in my current job. I continued to perform well, but 6 months turned into 12, as I watched several of my peers get promoted with less tenure than I had.

Looking back, it was a mistake to follow the advice. Staying in that same job longer than necessary led to stagnation – I wasn’t learning as much, and I feared my decision spoke negatively about my ambition and desire to grow. Fortunately, I was able to find a different new opportunity about a year and half later, but I always wished I had jumped at the opportunity sooner.

When “Playing the Game” Went Against My Gut

At another point in my career, I was matrix-reporting to two managers at the same time, leading a high-profile marketing team. We were faced with a new competitor, and our market leading position was at risk. The stakes were high, and we had to make an important and far-reaching strategic marketing decision.

My two managers had completely opposing ideas about which path we should take. I had a good idea about how we could maintain our leadership position in the category, but I could not move forward without agreement and alignment from my managers.

One of my managers pulled me aside and asked me to take his side and go against the other manager in our strategy meetings. He positioned his advice as “being strategic” and “taking a bold stance.” He said that it would help my career and show that I had the authority to move the organization forward in a positive way. He also implied that it would be a strong show of loyalty towards him.

But something didn’t sit right with me. First, I didn’t think his recommendation was completely supported by the data. Second, if I had followed his approach, I would have burned a bridge and put my integrity at risk. I thought that a more open and collaborative process would be a better way to reach the right conclusion. I told him I’d rather approach the decision by looking at the data and talking it through with everyone. It was not the easiest discussion, but I think it was the right one. I had to stay true to my own beliefs.

I felt good about the approach I took, even though the manager who asked me to go against the other held a grudge and treated me differently after that. I ended up losing his support, but I was able to maintain my own principles about how I wanted to lead and work with people.

I’ve received great advice from senior leaders throughout my career. These two experiences shaped how I thought about filtering advice. I learned that just because someone is senior or experienced doesn’t mean their advice is right for you – they might be giving you advice that is right for them.

So how do you handle bad career advice in a tactful and professional way?

Here’s How to Filter and Manage Bad Advice

1. Think through what you’re asking for and how you ask

Narrow down exactly what you want to get advice on. Use these ideas and examples to frame your question:

– “I’m trying to compare these two scenarios: what do you think I am missing?”
– “Here’s the approach I want to take: what you do you think?”
– “I’m approaching someone I don’t know for a request – do you have any tips?”

Consider seeking advice from a few sources, rather than just one. When you ask for advice, let them know how you’re approaching the situation:

– “I’m gathering input from a few people on this – what would you recommend?”

– “I’m looking for a few different perspectives on this issue…”

These tactics will allow you to get better specific input rather than general advice, and it gives you a way out if you decide not to follow the advice. It also shows that you are being thorough and thoughtful about seeking input. You’re not committing to following one recommendation blindly; instead, you’re thinking through multiple opinions before making your own decision.

2. Continue to do your own homework

You shouldn’t rely solely on input from others. There may be other data or sources of information to inform your decision and help you understand if the advice you are getting is good or bad. If you’re making an important business decision, continue to evaluate the financial, customer and market research data and analytics. If you’re making a career decision, look at industry information and skills and experience profiles. Gather all the information you can to add to the advice you’ve received.

3. Evaluate the input you get

Not all advice is created equal. You will have to assess the recommendations from others and think about it in the context of your own experiences and objectives. Think about these questions when you analyze it:

– Does the input take into account the full situation?

– Is this advice coming from someone who understands all the issues?

– What happens if I follow the advice? What happens if I don’t?

– Does this align with my values and long-term goals?

– What does my gut instinct say?

If the advice seems off, trust yourself. You are the only one who is truly looking out for your own best interests.

4. Trust yourself and your instincts

You’re the one who must take accountability for your decisions – whether it’s a decision about allocating resources, a strategy choice or a career move. You’ve got to be comfortable with your choices and be ready to live with the consequences. You are in the best position to understand what is right and wrong for you. If you get some advice that does not feel right, or doesn’t line up with your core values, then something is probably wrong. Just because someone gave you advice is not a reason act on it. You’ve got to trust yourself and make the best decision for you, especially when it comes to decisions about your career and your professional growth.

5. When you decline to follow advice

If you decide not to follow someone’s advice, it’s best to take a few minutes to let them know why you went in a different direction. You can avoid burning bridges and even build trust and credibility by giving your rationale. Make sure to show that you valued their input and included it in your decision-making process. One suggestion is to use the following to explain in a respectful way:

“Thanks for your advice and I appreciate your perspective. After thinking it through and considering different angles, I decided to go in a different direction because [it aligns better with my long-term goals..OR…I had some additional data that led me to a different decision].”

This keeps your professional relationships intact while reinforcing that you’re making decisions based on the totality of the inputs and what you believe is best for you.

Final Thoughts: You’re in Charge of Your Career

There are many situations when seeking advice is a smart way to go. But, there are very few situations when blindly following the advice is the right approach. You should encourage yourself to think critically and evaluate all the information you have – your personal experiences, your values, data, multiple perspectives.

If you ever find yourself in a situation where you’re getting conflicting advice – or advice that doesn’t sit right with you – pause, assess, and understand the implications. Follow the 5 steps:

1. Refine what you ask for and how you ask

2. Do your homework

3. Evaluate all inputs

4. Trust your instincts

5. Decline when necessary

Use these steps to make the decisions that are right for you. You know best what aligns with your personal performance objectives and your long-term career goals. You’re in charge of your own situation, and you should make decisions that move you forward, not ones that could compromise your integrity. Great performance and fulfilling careers are built on the right choices you make for yourself.